To beat the inactivity of driving everywhere and sitting at a desk all day, I’ve been running in the morning. Although, the word ‘beat’ implies that I’m winning something and unless its weight gain, the two times I’ve gone jogging during the month we’ve lived here is hardly triumphant.
Regardless, I’ve finally completely weaned the baby. No more evening, night, or morning feedings. I can unabatedly drink coffee and wine until I’m bouncing off the walls or slurring-ly slow. It also means my nipples feel like they are about to explode and that I have porn star boobs, save for the bumps of milk ducts that are at full capacity.
During the shower after my morning of bouncing down the streets to Big Girls, You are Beautiful, which I sing with a bone of contention as I will never have curves in all the right places, I decided to take my sister’s advice and try to express that which was gifting me the only curves I have ever had (aside from those 9 month parasitic growths).
It is ironic that letting out the juice that’s causing backed up pain hurts more than just letting it back up. Hand expressing can be filed under sagas of womanhood with menstrual cycles and men. As I stood in the back of the stall, shooting milk toward the opposite end, I noticed I had some clogs in my spigot. The mounting pressure was exasperating the pain. I was watching grenades of milk grow under my skin like little gremlin eggs ready to break open and release their hatchlings. Stories of sucking out clogs and visions of pimple popping swirled in my head. I struggled with the idea of gifting the baby one last suckling. I do not feel like a breakfast of breast milk. The pimple popping method only worked to hurt myself more. I don’t even know if that’ll reach to my mouth!
The debate stopped there. The clogged milk ducts won. “Just express.” My sister makes everything seem so simple. In the end, I am hoping the problem resolves itself sans a final battle cry of a breast infection.
Did you ever have to suck clogs out of your breasts? What was your war strategy?
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you are hilarious! I would be annoying like your sister because expressing worked for me. plus that was almost 6 years ago and you know how the memory is for us moms.
good for you for bouncing down the street! I’m about to do that in an hour…
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Um. I don’t have anything to add since I was a failure at breastfeeding, but…glad I wasn’t eating breakfast during reading this post
The imagery was a bit intense (kudos to your writing on that!)
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Oh my. This brings all the pain and cracked nipples and misery of breast feeding back to me like it was yesterday. I actually used to wear cabbage in my bra. Yes, right by my nose to alleviate those clogged ducts. Like regularly. And I’d massage them. And pray I didn’t get engorged so big that I’d rupture or get an infection. Luckily neither. Good luck on the home stretch.
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When I weaned my daughter, I used a breast pump and pumped a little each day to relieve some of the pressure. I tried to do less and less each day so my body would produce less milk naturally. After doing this a few days, I was able to just stop. If you’re really uncomfortable, call your OB and see what they recommend doing. You don’t want to get an infection, that’s for sure!
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Ugh…what memories you bring back!! I expressed a little each day with a hand pump, and long warm showers helped alot!! Good luck!!
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holy lovely comment you left me.
so re: the whole ‘ending the boob juice’ thing – I was stuffing cabbage leaves in my bra and taking hot showers – so I don’t think I’m the best to give advice. Did you ask for advice? jaysus. Anyhoo – I MUST tell you that MIKA is one of the cds in the car that my boys will listen to and sing along with me. Big Girls are a fave, as well as LollyPop [HEY - what's the big ideeeeeea?]
that is all. nigh nigh.
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